A Season Ends

J just left for the last day of his summer externship.  And we are sad.

For the past year and a quarter, our little family has enjoyed a sweet season of life, and that season ends on Monday.  When Riggins was born, J began his 3rd year of optometry school.  You may remember that 3rd year included the first part of board exams that were taken last Spring.  In preparation for those exams, third year students have a significant amount of free time built into their schedules that is intended to be study time.  Last January and February, J used that extra study time to the fullest.  But last fall and last spring once boards were over, he enjoyed at least one day off per week (sometimes two), and the luxury of coming home for lunch quite often.  He came home at a decent hour every night.  

Then, this summer, his externship down in Mississippi had an awesome schedule.  The practice was closed on Mondays and didn't open until 2 on Thursdays, so all summer he has been working 3 1/2 hour days.  It has been bliss.  

Honestly, this schedule has made my first year of motherhood so much easier.  I fully realize that.  If I really needed to run an errand without Riggins during the week, or desperately needed some girl time, I could almost always arrange for J to watch Riggins at some point during the week.  Most importantly, we have been spoiled to enjoy so much quality time together as a family, and J has been given an opportunity that few fathers are offered: frequent one-on-one time with his child.  

On Monday, J will begin his rotation at the VA Hospital.  He has to report at 7 a.m. each morning for his first patient at 7:15.  He does not get a lunch break.  And he cannot leave the hospital until every other extern is finished with their patients.  All for one and one for all, or something like that.  They are going to be long days, for both of us.  And then next Spring he will finish out his extern year with a rotation back at the optometry school clinic.  Word on the street is that hours at the school are actually the worst.  

So basically, our family is mourning the end of an era.  We realize that what we are about to experience is what most families experience from day one (and some of you medical resident wives are probably scoffing at how much you would kill for even our new schedule!), but this is a change for us.  Jonathan is sad to know that he will never get the kind of time he has enjoyed with Riggins with any of our future children.  I am nervous to embark on longer days alone, just as my little toddler really starts to exert his independence and wild side.  But mostly, we are sad to lose so much quality time as a family, our mid-week trips to the zoo, our mid-day errands, trips to the park and walks around the neighborhood, kitchen dance parties and lunches together.  It has been a sweet season of life and I will always hold my memories of this time close to my heart.   

And then, before we know it, he'll be graduating.  And we'll be moving.  So I guess we're just sad knowing that this fall kicks off one last year in Memphis, a city that we have grown to dearly love.  I am sad knowing that so much change and transition is on the horizon.  I am not ready to say goodbye to friends, our home, our church, our neighborhood.  I am not ready to start over again.  

But none of that is happening tomorrow, so the mission is to savor this year.  To be fully present with my little boy each day, even when the hours drag on.  To fully enjoy this great city.  To soak up time with our dear friends and church family.  To thank God for his provision here, and to trust him for his provision as we move forward.